Wednesday, October 18, 2006

toe to head the inverse of head to toe

I think it important to note that I am on the verge of emotional implosion. It's not the most important thing to note about me, but currently it is taking precedence.
Anyway, as I was getting dressed this morning I realized this headache that has been plaguing me for the last month or so is in fact stress-related. I feel the stress ever mounting. How does it all balance? school, work, cats, friends, working out, boyfriend, ....sanity? I need to trim back one some aspects of this equation. Up to this point, I haven't even considered sanity. And sanity has made itself known as a required situation this past week. stupid sanity!
I digress. With all of this fleeting through my mind, I got dressed in quite a different fashion than I normally do.
I will be completely honest and say that when I get dressed I think of whom I will see and what will make me look more favorably to them. It sucks, I know, but it is what goes through my mind as I put on the obnoxious jungle pants. Which is to say, I don't always dress for approval. Very often I dress to repulse. But as I got dressed this particular morning, I thought back to a simpler time. A time when I knew I wasn't fashionable and didn't give a rats ass. So as I write I am dressed as follows: black mary jane's; maroon, grey, and black striped leggings; black, pleated skirt, grey long-sleeved shirt underneath a maroon, youth soccer t-shirt. I look absolutely ridiculous! And it has made me a bit happier, if not overall at least when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror.
now I have decided to dedicate an hour to myself to do nothing homework related. I'm going to get a chamomile tea and a greasy piece of pizza and take deep cleansing breaths. Ahhh... The zen of an over extended student.